When a loss is public — service deaths, line-of-duty deaths, disasters — grief happens under observation, with ceremonies, media, and other people's meanings attached.
Honour and pride can sit alongside fury and emptiness. Ceremony is not the same as comfort.
Community loss also means everyone around you is grieving, which can leave no one with spare capacity.
Specialist peer organisations exist for exactly these losses and are usually the fastest route to people who understand.